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What My Family Didn't Know How to Say

My mom used to leave the porch light on. Every night, no matter what time it was, no matter what state I'd come home in or whether I came home at all — the light was on. She never made a big deal of it. It was just always there. For a long time I didn't think much about it. Now I can't think about it without my throat tightening.

By FAN

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The Day I Stopped Pretending

I was good at pretending. That's the thing nobody tells you about addiction — how functional it lets you be for a long time. I had a job. I showed up to things. I said the right words at the right moments and most people in my life had no idea how bad it had gotten. I had built a very convincing version of myself that looked like someone who was fine.

By FAN